Hi all,

*Whew*, it has been like 30,000,000 years since I’ve come here to write about cooking and dancing and drinking and living in styyyyle (well, at least a couple of those topics). I just finished a funky electro-infused instrumental hip hop album, and am close to finishing an underground house album as well- details will be here in a bit. I’ve been working on music 5+ nights per week and fitting in the rest of my life around that and my day job. As a result, I just haven’t been cooking very much!

I know, sacrelege. Well, anyhow, I couldn’t stay away for long. It’s time to sharpen those knives, blow the dust off the mortar and pestle, and get cracking.

Today’s recipe bears more than a passing resemblance to the green peppercorn aioli I outlined in one of my first posts here. I’ve deemed it a creme bruschetta topping this time, though, and I think you’ll see why.

Creme Bruschetta, Rainy Day RX
First, wash a handful of green peppercorns and add to your mortar. Sprinkle a few black peppercorns and cumin seeds over that, and a healthy pinch of coarse sea salt. Thrash these things until you’re gazing into a nice little pile of green paste. (If you can’t find green peppercorns, try this with capers- the taste won’t be anything like this one but it’ll be yummy nonetheless- oh, and omit the salt if you do that.)

Chop a good medium-sized tomato, a small shallot and a washed handful of fresh cilantro (save a bit of this for later) and invite them to the aromatic party already starting in the mortar. “It’s the place to be“, you’ll say, boasting casually about how the evening’s just started and already there’s maaaaad flava up in the spot. They’ll be thrilled..

..until you tromp them, too, into paste and grind the whole lot together with light, swirling strokes of the pestle. Press in a clove or two of garlic, and what you’ll have now will look like this:

(Well, sort of, anyway. My blogging skills are still what I’d call RUSTY and, well, I’m hoping you won’t notice I forgot to take a pic of the mixture before I added the vegan mayo.)

Next up, guess what?! You’ll spoon in about a tablespoon of vegan mayo (or regular mayo, if you’re into it- I just like veganaise better). Mix well and you’ll end up with your finished creme bruschetta mix, which will likely look like this:

I’ve bunged mine into a jar for safe keeping, as you’ve doubtlessly noticed. Place yours into the fridge to cool and let the flavors marry for a bit while we prepare..

..why, yes, the baguette! (I told you my blog skills were a little off- it’ll take me a post or two get my snap back, I think..)

Have the baguette and cut it into little 6″ parralellograms. Heat those quadrangles until they’re tantalizingly warm. Here I’m just doing a couple (one for me, and one for my dear image consultant, so I’m using my favorite cooking-implement-cum-self-defense-tool, the iron skillet:

If you’re preparing lots of these at once, a cookie sheet in an oven set to broil will do nicely. A few minutes ought to do it. Spoon the bruschetta mix onto your bread pieces as thick as you like and drop the little bit of cilantro I asked you to save earlier onto them, from a couple of feet above the plate.

That trick, btw, is how chefs sprinkle garnishes onto dishes with that all-encompassing-but-pleasingly-unregimented pattern. The bit of distance separates the pieces and randomizes their trajectory, and you end up with the following:

The cooled sauce atop warm bread is just heaven. What contrast! Such a bifurcation can only find unity in your mouth. This sauce would straight-up pwn on a bit of whitefish or in a vegetable sandwich (it’s going to get tested in that configuration tonight).

Ok, so it’s not my best work. Sue me, ok? I’ve been editing tiny pieces of audio, frowning into my Red Bull for like, weeks! I’m just getting back into the swing here.

Anyway, the end result evokes a standard bruschetta, plus the piquancy of the peppercorns, the full, creamy flush of just enough mayo, and a cilantro punchline- it’s perfect for a day like today when spring and all of its radiance can’t hurry closer fast enough. Anyhow, make up a few of these, pair them up with a little dry white wine and light a little fire.

Winter will leave us yet.

Filed under: Recipes

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